I am so mad I could spit nails!

[lilshadow]

Hello Everyone,
My strike is going well, as you know it started last night. My 16 year old has figured out that I am very serious. He had to make his own dinner. I came home from work to all animals fed and watered, dishes cleaned. I told the 18 year old, my house my rules if you don't like it get out. I told him that there is nothing stopping him, but himself. I will keep you posted on how my strike is going. So far it's good. See ya later.

 

[Poison Ivy]

I'm so glad to hear things were done for you today! Congrats and wishing things go good with the 18 year old too.

 

[morelcabin]

Congratulations on taking control Lilshadow! Get all those ducks in order and you'll all be smiling again soon...meanwhile enjoy the strike...you might decide *never* to go back to work

 

[paisleycj]

Very good. Sounds like your 16yo can take a hint. Stick to your plans. There's been a lot of good advice on the forum, and a lot of support. Also some leaning toward the negative. I work in a prison, and see what happens to men who think they can do what ever they want. Surprisingly, a good majority of them come from good homes. They tell me they weren't raised to behave the way they did to get in trouble. What I'm trying to get at, is that if you honestly do the best you can as a parent, the rest is up to the young adult. You can give them the tools, but you can't think for them. Don't beat yourself up about your parenting skills, if you've really done the best you can. Sounds like you and your DH are really trying. It's not just up to you though, your sons need to decide the type of people they want to be. Bottom line though, it's your house, your rules!! Good luck to you all!

 

[PulletSurprise]

Quote:
Woot! Woot! WTG Lil!!! Stay strong!

 

[EweSheep]

Way to go! Lets update on the strikes! I bet all of us would be following this thread for a good while and use some of the sound advices from our members on our unruly kids (ours or others!)

 

[CityGirlintheCountry]

GO you!

On a positive note- I coach a summer swim team. I've been at the same pool for 14 years now. At the pool today a man walked up to me and said "Hi, coach! Bet you don't remember me!" It was one of my original kids. I think I had him from age 14 to 17 or so. He was great for me and I adored him, but he gave his parents fits. He was considered one of the bad boys of the neighborhood. Well, he is all grown up now and has two little kids of his own. He joined the marines out of high school and is now a fireman. Once I got past feeling REALLY OLD, it was great seeing what a fine grown-up he turned into. I always worried that he would not make it. Apparently his parents applied the tough love principle too and it worked out well for him. It was really cool (although I'm still reeling from the whole "Am now old enough to coach a second generation" thing...)

Good luck to you on your strike!

 

[Mom 2em All]

I just felt compelled to add my own rant to your original rant- I am mom to a fifteen year old. Poor kid thinks he was born a royal prince.
He is a great cause of stress here in the house- doesnt know how to speak proper to me or my girls (age 12 and 10 ). I can ask him even the simplest question and he bites my head off. Very disrespectful, very very lazy, and thinks that I love the girls more than him. Yells at his sisters, cusses them out when I am not around, and has 'fits of rage' now and again-full of cussing at me, *F this *F that, when I try to get him to do something that he doesnt think is fair.

I work full time, and get up at 4:00 every single morning to care for the animals and to get ready for work. I WAKE him up, repeatedly-because he never gets up the first time- then, drive him to school (no bus). Get his sisters up get them ready and off to school, then go to work myself.

I pay his stupid cellphone bill ($60) a month- in turn he is to vacumme the livingroom, take out the trash and keep his room clean. He has a cellphone so I can reach him/vice versa, after sports, while he is out, etc.

I have to hound him constantly to get these chores done..."I was going to do it Mom" or "I WILL!!!!"......when?
His sister does a great majority of the housework without being asked, yet he constantly says that they dont do anything. Asking him to do more, like cut the lawn, will send him off into a big tantrum/rage. And it doesnt get done, usually.

The boy stands four inches taller than me, and his arm span is much wider than mine. A few times he has puffed his chest out to me- and I have dropped him to the ground. (bout killed me to do it, both mentally and physically-I am old- but I AM MOM.)
He threatened to kick the dog/ hit the dog a few times-because the weiner dog is annoying and barks at everything- and was met with instant mom-fury by me. He then tells me I would choose the animals over him. I replied before to that with, "the animals dont disrespect me".

I drive him and his friends where they need/want to go, and more often than not-am his ride home, too. I have told him he can always call me, because I dont ever want him to be in a car with someone intoxicated, etc...but he uses me. I know this.
He is responsible for his own laundry because he accuses me and his sister of losing his clothes/taking his clothes whenever we do it. Its still my fault when he doesnt have any clean clothes. Or he cant find socks. He is like a walking tornado- leaves messes everywhere he has been.

I am ready to send him off for the summer because I dont think I can handle the stress he brings. He is so mean to his sisters- they cant even speak without him snapping at them...I worry about them being home with him all summer while I am at work. His grandpa lives in Tennessee, out in the sticks- no computer, no cable...lol...probably no cellphone service.

Reading this thread makes me feel a little better- like I am not the only one going through this.

 

[hcammack]

send him away I love being out of touch and I know it centers me and makes me allot less difficult.

Henry

 

[Reinbeau]

Mon2emall, you aren't alone, but take the advice in this thread and shut him down. Stop paying his phone bill, stop driving him around, stop caving into him just to try to get by - it won't teach him a thing. I'm 5'7", both my boys reached 6' long ago (heck, the youngest is 6'5"!), but you can't let him intimidate you. Get tough with him now or you'll have absolutely no control over him by the time he's 17. He needs a hard lesson right now!