You are not the only one. I have kept Bob's for 5 years and just can not find the courage to take their lives. It is not that I am scared of dead things, gore or the blood. But rather that after keeping them for so long, I have come to understand that they all have personalities, desires, awareness, and thought processes. They have also become more like "pets" to me. I hatched MOST of them, and knowing what I know about them, the act of killing them would take away all that I have put into them. If I felt they were lower on the scale of awareness of life, like lettuce, or garden flowers, then I would probably be able to butcher them. The drama that killing them would cause would out weight the meat afterwards.
So I totally understand where you are at. However, now that you have already butchered 5 of them and if you can manage to get past this early stage of shock, maybe you can learn to separate yourself early on from your quail and go on to grow them for food. I really wish I could separate myself from my bobs. It must be done early on in the stages of keeping quail. I wish you all the best of luck!!