What is the average medical costs for having a baby?

[EweSheep]

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X2

IF you have assets, they will tell you to get it cashed in. That is why I lost my 401K plan because they consider it as an asset and they would refuse medical care if I kept it. So I went ahead and cashed my 401K to get the baby stuff like the crib, mattress, her clothes and three months of diapers. It sucks because you know you would need your 401K but we were frugal with it AFTER we got the baby stuff, then we got the mortgage in hubby's name (my credit sucked/bankruptcy a few months before dd was born, before we were married), put down payment toward closing, got a good used van with NO loan. We were tight but we made it. Medicaid is strictly by income and how desperate you are. House is not one of their "assets" so no worries there but there can be some fine lines if you were building a house, money coming in, they may deny you. If yo uhad the house built and stayed for awhile, then lost insurance and so forth, then they might. Your hubby may or may NOT be covered under Medicaid. Just you and baby.

Sensible if you ask me, get yourself on preventative measures, that way you wont get caught unexpected. Keep in mind BC is not always 100 fool proof, my SIL got pregnant on her BC and used rubbers but got pregnant anyway. You have plenty of time to get the house built.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

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It isn't even the money issue that bothers me the most.....if everyone waited until they could truely afford a baby no one would ever have one! What bothers me is that you don't even have your own home......you are living in his parents house. Move out....rent a place of your own or build your house.....either one, but have your own place before you have a baby.

X2

And the idea that if you have your own place, that the grandparents will not get to know their grandchild is just plain wrong--unless you plan to move cross country a few thousand miles away, which it does not sound like. As a new family, you need your own space. If the in-laws had a big rambling home, and a fair portion of it was available to you & dh as your private residence, maybe mving out wouldn't be such a big deal, but as it is, the house is small, you have one room, which is both cold and hot, depending on weather, heavy smokers in the rest of the house.

Take things one step at a time--figure out when you can complete the house (be it a build, purchase of an existing home or a rental), and do not even THINK about planning a baby until you have been in it for at least several months. It is one thing to daydream about having kids. Mycousin knew what she would name her daughter from the time she was a child, and I can remember daydreaming about different things about being a mama when I was little. But there is a huge difference between daydreaming and planning. At this stage of your life, any daydreaming should be minimal--not an extensive focus.

 

[schellie69]

My daughter had her 1st daughter in 08 and she was still one our insurance with hospital, doctor visits and c-section it was close to $40,000 dollars with her 2nd daughter she had in 09 the last 3 months she had no insurance and the hospital bill with a c-section she is still paying for it. Now she is paying for a divorce. Her and both her girls live with us due to her only working part-time and neither dad paying child support if it wasn't for us she would not be able to make it. Have your own house before you have a baby. Make sure you and your husband's life is stable and you are ready to bring that child home. My daughter learned the hard way when she got married and was living with her husbands mother We kept her 1st daughter because they had no room for her. She wishes she had waited until she had her own home before she had children it is harder to get out on your own with the cost of raising a child. I had the sling for my 2nd daughter it was great for breast feeding and cleaning since she was a grazer and it took her so long to eat. There are a lot of things that they have for babies that you can do without or buy 2nd hand. That is what we did for both my daughters girls garage sales and family hand me downs. There are a bunch of girls clothes that are not pink but you have to realize that your child will have their own likes and dislikes and if you have a little girl her favorite color might just be pink. Good luck but if I were you I would wait until you and your husband are in your own home and stable.

 

[zippitydooda]

Quote:
X 10000000000 !!!!

NO WAY should you have a child if you are not able to afford your own place. Children cost you boatloads of money until they are married and sometimes even afterward.

You sound like you already know the answer to your question. Go with your instincts.

 

[ccm352]

in 2007 when my daughter was born.. Vaginal birth. 2 night stay. Insurance paid 27k. My out of pocket was 350 bucks. In 2009 when my son was born emergency c-section, 4 night stay insurance paid 43k my out of pocket was $1050.

 

[babylady4]

Midwife 15 years ago cost me $1500.

Wanna save money? Breastfeed; better for you , baby, and you have saved $$$ in the end.


I would suggest you move out first though.

 

[reveriereptile]

Quote:
It isn't even the money issue that bothers me the most.....if everyone waited until they could truely afford a baby no one would ever have one! What bothers me is that you don't even have your own home......you are living in his parents house. Move out....rent a place of your own or build your house.....either one, but have your own place before you have a baby.

X2

And the idea that if you have your own place, that the grandparents will not get to know their grandchild is just plain wrong--unless you plan to move cross country a few thousand miles away, which it does not sound like. As a new family, you need your own space. If the in-laws had a big rambling home, and a fair portion of it was available to you & dh as your private residence, maybe mving out wouldn't be such a big deal, but as it is, the house is small, you have one room, which is both cold and hot, depending on weather, heavy smokers in the rest of the house.

Take things one step at a time--figure out when you can complete the house (be it a build, purchase of an existing home or a rental), and do not even THINK about planning a baby until you have been in it for at least several months. It is one thing to daydream about having kids. Mycousin knew what she would name her daughter from the time she was a child, and I can remember daydreaming about different things about being a mama when I was little. But there is a huge difference between daydreaming and planning. At this stage of your life, any daydreaming should be minimal--not an extensive focus.

My husband wants the kids soon incase his parents pass away before our are old enough to have a chance to remember them. He doesn't want the kids in his parent's house for that purpose though. He never got to really know his grandfather since he passed away when he was young and didn't know his mother's dad either. I only knew my mom's grandmother since the others passed away early. His mother already had cancer years ago and his dad is having problems from where he was in the house with her when she was having the treatment which the radiation affected him. He also wants them to know my parents which they live 14 hours away and have health problems and don't have much money so the kids won't get to see them often. I talked with my husband about the insurance, my worries, and a few other things. He isn't worried about the money to much except for the delivery and possible complications which he does want the insurance for that. He doesn't mind paying out of the pocket for the doctor visits. I think we finally have it settled. We will sign up for insurance now and find out when we would be covered for all the doctor costs to have a baby. While that is going on we will get the house plans and other stuff ready to start building the house. That way we will be in the house before we have any kids and so I won't be around the smoke while pregnant and to have everything settled in. I'm going to be trying to get into college this fall hopefully so I can get that started. I also told my husband I want the baby to be born during the summer cause the winters around here are bad and I'm worried about going into labor and get stuck on the way there. He agreed it would be better since it is a 20 minute drive to the hospital on good days. I have some baby books I left at my dads house that I'll have sent up to give to my husband to read and for me to go over them again. One is a large thick book that my sister got for free when it was being offered from the Mayo Clinic website and the other is one I found at a goodwill that had detailed describtions on how to clean the baby during diaper changes and other stuff that the Mayo one didn't go into much detail over. We've been together for a little over 7 years and have not used any type of birth control so I'm not worried about becoming pregnant before we would be covered. If we did then we would handle it and do a payment plan with the hospital. I do plan to breastfeed since I trust my milk better than the formula but know that sometimes babies have to have the formula. I'll use a pump before the formula though. We rarely get into arguements and I'll nag if I don't get my way. I guess that is what wives are for. That is how we came to an agreement on this. Our house is going to be built only a blocks distance down the road so his parents can ride the golf cart over to see us. His sister only lives a few miles away also. While we are holding off he doesn't know this but when we are at family gatherings I'm going to be handing him some kids so he can get more hands-on experience. I got lucky to have a chance at helping my sister raise her daughter for the first year and a half since the dad was a drug user and didn't come around. My husband didn't have that chance so he doesn't know what is in store for him. I know we will have it easier than my sister did due to us having money and there are two of us with plenty of relatives willing to lend us a hand. We do have relatives willing to give us hand-me-downs and I wish there was a goodwill here. I'd live in it. I'll be yard sale and craigslist shopping instead for used items. Seen a cute 9 piece crib bedding set on craigslist that online costs over $200 beind sold for only $50. I do appericate all the concerns, help, and information. Especially knowing about the insurance wait was a huge help. Neither one of us knew about that since before we got together we were covered by our parents plan. One thing that wasn't covered in the books I've read that I would like to know is how to potty train a boy. We are going to hold off till we are settled down and check the income to figure things out before starting. I think my husband realized that he can't just be popping out kids without planning it through to raise them better than we were raised. My family was on food stamps, saved money, used coupons, and had gov't help. His family he had his grandmother living here which pretty much raised him and his sister while his parents worked but his mom also spends a lot of money on stuff she doesn't need and unhealthy foods. We don't eat to good but are trying to change that around for our health and to set a good example for our kids one day. If anyone does have any good tips please do tell.

 

[TriciaHowe]

7 years without birth control of any type? When the time comes when you are serious about children/starting your family you may have to consult a fertility Dr. or reproductive endocrinologist. Sounds like one or both of you may have some fertility problems that may or may not be easily/cheaply fixed. My DH and I tried for 6 yrs. before our diagnosis and now have 4 kids so anything is possible. I wish you the best of luck with everything

 

[babylady4]

Check out the books by Sears and Sears. Very well written and they cover everything you would like to know.

The suggestion of a fertility doc is a good one as well. Nobody is THAT good with natural family planning......

 

[reveriereptile]

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We are wondering about that. My MIL took a long time for her to get pregnant and she had a miscarriage and then finally had my husband. My SIL has tried and isn't trying to not have kids and hasn't had any yet. It is possible that we will have problems. Might be something he is thinking about and possibly worrying that it will take longer for us to have kids. He probably just doesn't want to admit it since he likes to think of himself as a manly man. It will be 8 years in August that we had started dating and been married for a couple years.