grannys gone and done it

[enola]

I am sure we can all relate to at least one of the following  

> SOME OF THESE ARE REALLY FUNNY AND SOME HIT CLOSE TO HOME.  ENJOY.
 
> Subject: Getting Old
 
 
> ·            I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off!   
>
> ·            Old age is coming at a really bad time!
>
> ·            When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment  ...  now, as a grown up,  it just feels like a small vacation!
>
> ·            The biggest lie I tell myself is ... "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."    
>
> ·            Lord,  grant me the  strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!
>
> ·            I don't have gray hair.  I have "wisdom highlights." I'm very wise.
>
> ·            My people skills are just fine.  It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.
>
> ·            Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.
>
> ·            If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would've put them on my knees. 
>
> ·            The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please.  I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes" .
>
> ·            I'm going to retire and live off of my savings.  Not sure what I'll do that second week.
>
> ·            When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people"?
>
> ·            I've lost my mind and I'm pretty sure my kids took it!
>
> ·            Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!
>
> ·            Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
>
> ·            Lord, Give me patience and give it to me NOW.
>
> ·            Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice. 
>
> ·            Oops!  Did I roll my eyes out loud?
>
> ·            At my age "getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering why I went there.

 

Twisted is on a ROLL ! I can say Amen to some of them and yep that's me to the rest.....

 

[enola]

Saved the best for last and then I will go quietly.....
[COLOR=006600]Confused[/COLOR]
[COLOR=006600]I became confused when I heard the word[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]"Service"[/COLOR][COLOR=FF0000] [/COLOR][COLOR=006600]used with these agencies:[/COLOR]

[COLOR=006600]Internal Revenue[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]U.S. Postal[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]Telephone[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]Cable TV[/COLOR][COLOR=CC0000] [/COLOR][COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR][COLOR=CC0000] [/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]Civil[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]State, City, County & Public[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]Customer[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]This is not what I thought[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR][COLOR=006600] [/COLOR][COLOR=006600]meant.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=006600]But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]'Service'[/COLOR][COLOR=006600] [/COLOR][COLOR=006600]a few cows.[/COLOR] [COLOR=FF0000]BAM[/COLOR][COLOR=FF0000]!!! [/COLOR] [COLOR=006600]It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those agencies are doing.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=006600]I hope that you are now just as enlightened as I am[/COLOR]

I read this to Mike and he said, I thought you were on a chicken site! Anything else good on there? .......... If he only knew!

 

[enola]

at least I haven't been hissed at by the califoniaites  to that post yet. 

Don't worry Twist, we have your back! Don't we girls??

 

[enola]

OMG   and remember party lines we had those for a while growing up as well.

I grew up in Woodstock VA. We had party lines. We also had a nosey neighbor that would pick up on the line a lot of the time. Sometimes you could actually hear her gasp, giggle or background noise when she was snooping on the line.

If Grandma wanted to talk to Moma, she would call and Moma would send me to visit with the neighbor lady so they could have a private conversation. It would be so funny watching her fidget, because she knew Moma was on the phone and she couldn't listen as long as I was there!

 

[ChickenLady2014]

I grew up in Woodstock VA. We had party lines. We also had a nosey neighbor that would pick up on the line a lot of the time. Sometimes you could actually hear her gasp, giggle or background noise when she was snooping on the line.

If Grandma wanted to talk to Moma, she would call and Moma would send me to visit with the neighbor lady so they could have a private conversation. It would be so funny watching her fidget, because she knew Moma was on the phone and she couldn't listen as long as I was there!

What a great idea.

 

[ChickenLady2014]

Don't worry Twist, we have your back! Don't we girls??

Yes we do!

 

[enola]

Good morning! 9:00 here now, but was up a six. 

When I was younger, I perferd coloring books over drawing. But now I love to freehand. I remember the kids in my school always crowded around me to watch me draw. Once i brought a crowd of twenty during recess!

But I do stop for a good coloring book now and then

I super LOVE to color. Especially with my grandkids

 

[TwoCrows]

guess what ? turkey butt. I just passed out from my sugar. was typing and eating then nothing. came to with a plate that HAD cake on it. (thank you ol mare) and computer gone. I guess my husband fed me cake , son checked my sugar. 44 . sucks to have cake and not remember eating it
thank you to all for the help with the polish. as York said, they are a little daft. tired now

Oh you poor dear!!

Take care of yourself and don't let that happen again!!!

 

[enola]

OMG, @enola
-- absolutely fabulous grandbabies you have (was going to say beautiful, but not sure the boys would appreciate that, lol)

Of course they are beautiful.

. They are too young to realize beautiful actually means handsome!

 

[enola]

enola, beautiful grandbabies ! that baby is cracking up because big brother is laying on him. hahaa  tell you son happy birthday from granny ! 

I called him to wish him Happy Birthday and he has been so busy, he didn't even realize it was his birthday!