Have you ever considered talking to a professional about how to handle your anxiety issues? They may be able to teach you some coping skills.
You mentioned that you have to feed the dogs at night. Why not switch them to the morning, and then you have all day and the night to spend with your DH. Maybe you could stay with him a night or two and cut down on some of the travel.
I'm sorry I'm not a sugar coater, I tend to be direct ...so... you need to learn to cope with these issues so they don't control and consume your life, especially when your stress levels are higher. I had issues when I was younger, so I can sympathize, but I've learned not to let so many things bother me or to get so out of hand where I cannot control how it affects me. If you don't it will just snowball on you and then something bad could happen, an accident, you get really sick, start drinking again etc.... you need to get a grip on yourself if not for anything but your DH sake and your own health and sanity!
I hope your DH gets better soon and make it a point to take a few minutes out each day and just care for your self! Maybe meditation would be helpful!