My mom is strange LOL

sharp as a marble (not too smart)

sharp as a tack (very smart)

built like a battleship (not sure of all the nuances)

face like a hatchet

don't cry over spilled milk

water over the dam / under the bridge (it is too late now)

the further up a ladder a monkey climbs, the more his a$$ is exposed (people in high places are vulernable)
 
Doesn't know sh@# from Shinola

Hotter than a Hen under a tub

Busier than a one eyed man at a girly show

Busier than a one armed paper hanger

If you have to many liabilities, your assets in jail
 
My DH has a ton of these

Hotter than a four-balled tomcat

You can wish in one hand and sh*t in the other and see which one fills up faster

Slicker than owl sh*t on a tin roof

Turn on a dime and kick you nine cents change

I'll build a shoe factory in your a$$

I'll stomp a mudhole in your a$$ and walk it dry
 
i got one calling the hogs suuuuueeeeeeeewwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeee pig pig pig sssssuuuuueeeeeeeewwwwweeeee now what the heck is that?
 
Quote:
What????? it works don't it?

I work with mentally handicapped adults. They have a kitten that's kept outside. When they want the kitten found they come ask me. Something about the way I call a cat get's it running every time.
Hereeeeeeeeeee kittykittykittykitttttttttttttttty
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