Nasty day here today, 44°f high temp, pouring rain and windy. For once the ladies are being smart and staying around their coop. I went and dumped a bunch of chopped straw and food/scratch in their run before they got up.
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This had me in stitches! So clearly written by someone who has spent many hours observing hen behaviors and attitudes. I think you were very accurate in your interpretation of what she would say if she could. Can not wait to hear what wisdom she will impart nextAsk Aurora
Our very first question comes from Diana.
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Diana asks:
Dear Aurora,
I am the ruler of my little tribe but Bernadette keeps taking my roosting spot. I peck her on the head but she ignores me. She jumps on top of me and she is very big. She has no manners.
What can I do?
Diana
Diana,
I am going to make a guess that you have achieved your lofty position through survival and attrition and not through ambition and action. It is clear that this insolent tramp Bernadette has no respect for her betters, including you. My guess is that you have one of these soft humans who dotes on you all and wishes “everyone would just get along”. Don’t listen to her. She knows nothing about the way of chickens. I am going to provide you with some advice that I hope you are hen enough to appreciate.
First and foremost, Niccolo Machiavelli said it best when he said, “He who wishes to be obeyed must know how to command.” It is clear you do not know how to command and do not have the respect of your lessors. So how do you gain the respect of your lessors? I can sum it up in one word.
FEAR
They need to fear you. More importantly, they need to fear your capriciousness. Attacking out of the blue for no apparent reason over nothing is a great way to engender fear and gain their respect. This needs to be a constant campaign. My second in command is much larger than me but is a sweet lady. Everybody loves her. They call her Hattie the Nice. She used to tell me to stop taking her food. Ha! I took it anyway.
How was I able to crush her and become Queen of my Tribe? I tried fighting her one on one, but like Bernadette, she was larger than me and others helped her because she was nice. However, I constantly harassed her and when the opportunity arose to pass her, I seized it. I now spend time every day attacking her for no reason. She must be constantly reminded that I am her better. To quote the great Machiavelli again, “It is much more secure to be feared than to be loved.”
You pecking Bernadette in the head only at bedtime when she takes something that is rightfully yours is pitiful. She does not fear it. I’m sure you give up after a couple of pecks and accept that she has taken what is yours for the night. Have you ever just thrown her off the roost for no reason? Try it sometime. It feels amazing.
I hope for your sake you take my advice and begin your campaign of fear soon. If not, it is certain that someday a hen with ambition, like yours truly, will come along and depose you as I did with Hattie the Nice. In fact, this Bernadette kind of reminds me of someone. You better get her in line quickly or you may suffer the same fate that Hattie did.
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I have been having a-lot of issues as well it started last night. Slow to respond and unusually hitchy.Having BYC login / out trouble today
You know, I want to hear how Mrs. BY Bob would phrase Aurora's point of view.I was curious if I could find her voice. Hopefully I can get better at answering as she would. Mrs BY Bob was very put off by Aurora's point of view.
Branch's opinion is that Jaffar must dress up, and that there should be photographic proof of it.And maybe get this Santa’s suit for the rooster? View attachment 3337390
It isThat sounds terrible.
Like the hat!Branch's opinion is that Jaffar must dress up, and that there should be photographic proof of it.
View attachment 3337402View attachment 3337403
Wow.Ask Aurora
Our very first question comes from Diana.
View attachment 3337054
Diana asks:
Dear Aurora,
I am the ruler of my little tribe but Bernadette keeps taking my roosting spot. I peck her on the head but she ignores me. She jumps on top of me and she is very big. She has no manners.
What can I do?
Diana
Diana,
I am going to make a guess that you have achieved your lofty position through survival and attrition and not through ambition and action. It is clear that this insolent tramp Bernadette has no respect for her betters, including you. My guess is that you have one of these soft humans who dotes on you all and wishes “everyone would just get along”. Don’t listen to her. She knows nothing about the way of chickens. I am going to provide you with some advice that I hope you are hen enough to appreciate.
First and foremost, Niccolo Machiavelli said it best when he said, “He who wishes to be obeyed must know how to command.” It is clear you do not know how to command and do not have the respect of your lessors. So how do you gain the respect of your lessors? I can sum it up in one word.
FEAR
They need to fear you. More importantly, they need to fear your capriciousness. Attacking out of the blue for no apparent reason over nothing is a great way to engender fear and gain their respect. This needs to be a constant campaign. My second in command is much larger than me but is a sweet lady. Everybody loves her. They call her Hattie the Nice. She used to tell me to stop taking her food. Ha! I took it anyway.
How was I able to crush her and become Queen of my Tribe? I tried fighting her one on one, but like Bernadette, she was larger than me and others helped her because she was nice. However, I constantly harassed her and when the opportunity arose to pass her, I seized it. I now spend time every day attacking her for no reason. She must be constantly reminded that I am her better. To quote the great Machiavelli again, “It is much more secure to be feared than to be loved.”
You pecking Bernadette in the head only at bedtime when she takes something that is rightfully yours is pitiful. She does not fear it. I’m sure you give up after a couple of pecks and accept that she has taken what is yours for the night. Have you ever just thrown her off the roost for no reason? Try it sometime. It feels amazing.
I hope for your sake you take my advice and begin your campaign of fear soon. If not, it is certain that someday a hen with ambition, like yours truly, will come along and depose you as I did with Hattie the Nice. In fact, this Bernadette kind of reminds me of someone. You better get her in line quickly or you may suffer the same fate that Hattie did.
View attachment 3337057