Thank you CB for putting this into words. Phyllis had an experience of motherhood, however brief.
Bob, although this plan didn’t work out, it came from a place of love. You didn’t set out to hurt anyone.
If the chicks had arrived when scheduled (which was completely out of your control) it may have turned out very differently.

Please be kind to yourself.:hugs
Well said. All of this.
 
Farewell for Now

I need to step away everyone. It's been too much.

Eve is here to see the chicks. 😔 So I am going to take advantage of that and spend the weekend concentrating on her.

I will likely be back on Sunday night.

Be nice to each other while I'm gone.

Thank you all for your wonderful support through all of this nightmare. I can never repay you all for it. You've been amazing. :hugs:hugs:hugs:hugs:hugs
Look after yourself Bob and enjoy Evie. :hugs
 
When my girls figured out the nipple waterer, there was a mad rush to try it out with pullets shoving each other away to get their turn. There are four nipples, but only one was worth fighting for!
Naturally, in the same way only one nest box will do when there are many to choose from! :rolleyes::lau
 
In Bobs absence, I hope you all don’t mind if I stick around (The situation with the chicks touched me pretty hard too) but I need support as well and you friends can do it. Yes I have my Jaffar emotional support rooster, but it’s a waiting list for me to sit on his counseling couch.
We’re here for you too Alex, and anyone else who needs it. :hugs
 
Honestly all I can think of at the moment is: what now?

What will happen moving forward in the future? Where to go next?

(Here's my synopsis for @Shadrach I suppose)

My first two chickens were the most affectionate. They were eager to hop on my arm and hid under me even as 6 week olds. At that time my viewpoint was optimistic and hopeful. I thought if they were just outside the glass back door we could watch them. But in one minute a fox had entered their temporary play pen. We managed to get the fox to drop them, but Cinnabar was dead and Creamsicle was dying of shock. My god I screamed. I was so stupid, but it felt just unfair.

However, there were four others we had taken in. They were not big fans of me. I tried to connect with them but they were not interested. Eventually all of them grew to be roosters anyway, which meant searching again.

I wanted pullets so I could just be done with the waiting game of hen vs rooster. I went to Facebook and found some EEs a few hours away. The seller said they had come from an excess order. I picked out my two and we went home. They were supposed to be 3 weeks old, but they were smaller than they should be. Inexperienced, I contacted the seller about the reddish tint of their poop who answered that it may have been from berries they ate. We did our best, but they were already so afflicted with coccidiosis that they died a few days after we got them. It was an experience to have a creature go into cardiac arrest in your hand. At that point it was hard to feel sad because I had already lost so much.

I couldn't bare to have sick chicks again. So I gave in and mail ordered 5 to be safe. The first few weeks were fine until one of my chicks had a respiratory issue. Luckily, the vet clinic that takes my cat and took my budgie sees chickens. He gave us medication for her. Breathing got better, eating got worse. There were many times I was prepared to lose her. After fighting for weeks my Platina has finally gotten better. My others Rime, Shirina, Katydid are well. Only cockrel Alba (from a pullet order) is alright too.

I know it's difficult to think "what next" now, but don't give up unless you absolutely want to. Horrible things happen to well meaning people for no reason. Loss can be sudden. Though this experience has been greatly harrowing, I hope you don't give up on chicks in the future.
Well said Blazinga. :hugs
 
Ok, while we’re supporting each other in Bob’s absence, I just wanted to share I’m feeling an incredible amount of remorse, regret and guilt for not trying harder with Dorothy. I don’t mean the day she got sick; I mean before that. She was laying soft eggs for a long time and I stopped trying to help since it didn’t seem to be working. Could have put her on hormones. Ugh. Poor, poor Dorothy with the lousy genetics, if that was her problem.💔
 
Ok, while we’re supporting each other in Bob’s absence, I just wanted to share I’m feeling an incredible amount of remorse, regret and guilt for not trying harder with Dorothy. I don’t mean the day she got sick; I mean before that. She was laying soft eggs for a long time and I stopped trying to help since it didn’t seem to be working. Could have put her on hormones. Ugh. Poor, poor Dorothy with the lousy genetics, if that was her problem.💔
Hindsight is a wonderful thing Michelle. :hugs
 

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