Fluffy Butt Acres: Stories of our flock

[Ponypoor]

Happy Friday everyone from the fluffy butts at the Chicken Palace.

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I love the feather colouring on that second last one, very striking.

 

[Ponypoor]

Wee Marty and the window well

 

[RoyalChick]

I love the feather colouring on that second last one, very striking.

That is Bernadette. I was so focused on getting her to be able to walk that I didn’t really stop to admire that she is quite a pretty you g lady!

 

[ChicoryBlue]

Stay of execution
Here is a short update on my beloved Bella Dracula. She has not been doing well at all. I think I already posted that she had stopped eating and drinking and I had decided to tube feed her. My thinking was that she is young and has a known viral infection which will most likely pass.
All was going well though she was dropping weight and getting weaker.
Then her crop started to slow and I couldn't tube feed her if her crop was already full without risk of aspiration. So she was getting less food and fluid. She has become physically very weak but mentally all there and interested in her surroundings and chatting to her buddies.
On Sunday I brought her in for a few hours because it was so unbearably hot. She delivered a quite normal poop and was interested in eating frozen corn kernels. I started to hope again.
Then Monday all action stopped. No reduction in crop size overnight or during the day and no poop. I resolved that if that was still the case this morning I would take her to be euthanised because starving to death did not seem like a humane way to die.
Sure enough early this morning there had been no poop overnight and her crop was the same size as on Monday and Sunday night with nothing having gone in.
As soon as the vet opened I made an appointment for her to be euthanised. I would be able to do it myself if she were in extreme pain - but when I pick her up she perks up and looks around and sometimes grooms my hair or my shirt. I didn't trust myself not to waver.
Appointment made I went back to the Chicken Palace to give her her 'last meal'. She had pooped and her crop was a little bit smaller. So I called the vet back and said I wasn't sure and I just needed her help with the decision.
Off we went. I opened up the cardboard box at the vet and Bella periscoped up. She devoured more corn and a treat the vet offered her.
The vet said, I think she needs more time.

Nobody get excited by this - I have been there 3 times already this last week - the difference here is I made it all the way to the vet.
But for now, Bella gets to live another day.
I on the other hand am completely exhausted with the stress of it all.

I am behind 40 pages, so please forgive me if events have foreclosed my reply here. But I am hoping I might be able to help you with your stress, by re-framing the situation a bit. I am relating to you through my own experiences, so forgive me if I've got a terribly wrong impression.

As I see it, the short summary is that you are stressed because you are feeling how "in the middle" everything is, and you don't want to dilly-dally on doing the best thing for Bella, and you don't want to jump the gun either. You see the potential bad outcome, yet still have hope given how she is, still interested and chatty. You are wanting a resolution one way or the other, and that can be stressful when that is not forthcoming, when you are getting very mixed signals. You are looking for progress and a future of certainty. Certainty is an illusion in the chicken world, besides in most of life. My advice is to let go of some control over the decision to euthanize or not, and trust yourself to see the answer clearly when it reveals itself to you, and what may be needed for that, as the vet said, is to allow some time. Give yourself time also. Slow down. Feeling very undecided all the time is incredibly stressful. So what can you do about that? Decide to not decide. Take a few slow deep breaths and merely "be" with Bella, how she is in the current moment, without thinking about what the next steps for her are. Not knowing what to do means you do not have an answer from her yet. That's okay.

 

[RoyalChick]

I am behind 40 pages, so please forgive me if events have foreclosed my reply here. But I am hoping I might be able to help you with your stress, by re-framing the situation a bit. I am relating to you through my own experiences, so forgive me if I've got a terribly wrong impression.

As I see it, the short summary is that you are stressed because you are feeling how "in the middle" everything is, and you don't want to dilly-dally on doing the best thing for Bella, and you don't want to jump the gun either. You see the potential bad outcome, yet still have hope given how she is, still interested and chatty. You are wanting a resolution one way or the other, and that can be stressful when that is not forthcoming, when you are getting very mixed signals. You are looking for progress and a future of certainty. Certainty is an illusion in the chicken world, besides in most of life. My advice is to let go of some control over the decision to euthanize or not, and trust yourself to see the answer clearly when it reveals itself to you, and what may be needed for that, as the vet said, is to allow some time. Give yourself time also. Slow down. Feeling very undecided all the time is incredibly stressful. So what can you do about that? Decide to not decide. Take a few slow deep breaths and merely "be" with Bella, how she is in the current moment, without thinking about what the next steps for her are. Not knowing what to do means you do not have an answer from her yet. That's okay.

Wise words, and very much appreciated.
Generally I have been living by them (or at least trying to). But sometimes you get too close to a situation to totally trust yourself. I found the vet’s reaction very helpful that she didn’t think I was pushing forward more for myself than for Bella.
Sometimes another pair of eyes is helpful to tell you what you see.

 

[ChicoryBlue]

Wise words, and very much appreciated.
Generally I have been living by them (or at least trying to). But sometimes you get too close to a situation to totally trust yourself. I found the vet’s reaction very helpful that she didn’t think I was pushing forward more for myself than for Bella.
Sometimes another pair of eyes is helpful to tell you what you see.

Just got a notification while I'm online, so in the present here! Yes, good, it's sp great you can consult this very empathetic vet! I didn't mean to imply you were acting there out of self-need (for certainty) and not out of doing what's best for Bella. I was trying to address the last sentence, just on how exhausted you felt with the stress.

 

[RoyalChick]

Just got a notification while I'm online, so in the present here! Yes, good, it's sp great you can consult this very empathetic vet! I didn't mean to imply you were acting there out of self-need (for certainty) and not out of doing what's best for Bella. I was trying to address the last sentence, just on how exhausted you felt with the stress.

I understood you perfectly and massively appreciate the thoughts.
Thank you.

 

[Ponypoor]

That is Bernadette. I was so focused on getting her to be able to walk that I didn’t really stop to admire that she is quite a pretty you g lady!

Wow that’s Bernadette?! She is so different now ! A grown lady! Her colour is lovely, so what breed is she again?

 

[RoyalChick]

Wow that’s Bernadette?! She is so different now ! A grown lady! Her colour is lovely, so what breed is she again?

She is a Welbar that as far as I can understand is almost identical to a Welsummer but has a barring gene.
It is recognized as a distinct breed in the UK but I am not sure it is in the US which I think is the same for the Legbars.
She is a bit skittish - perhaps not surprising after all the stuff I did to her - but she stops by to chat if I am around.

 

[BY Bob]

Lulu allowed me one glamor fluffy butt shot and then gave a side kick!
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What a character that one!