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- #43,761
I'm a very sorry to hear this. We all need some joy in our lives.Yes, sadly I've been reading.. I know it could be from something else, I figured I had this last year but wasn't diagnosed, and from reading I realize I could be suffering from it for a while. I also have something else going on that is hard to explain. I call it woozy head. Seeing another doc for that this month.. have seen a nuero.. I won't get into detail, but from having this horrible tummy thing plus this other, I've honestly been having a hard time doing/taking care of the chickens. Our son has helped but he and his wife work and he doesn't have the time to help as much as I need. I just don't feel well enough with this stomach thing. I used to get out there and clean like no other. I also don't want to take any chances. What if I'm a lucky one and this course of treatment helps and I don't have recurrence? I can hope. I'm getting old. I have to be well..I want to keep my husband home to die. I need to take care of me best I can. My kids thought at first it was stress causing my stomach problems. Maybe.
. Stress very well could have caused my immune system to misbehave. Stress can cause a lot of problems. I'm slowly losing my love of my life. Yes, I'm stressed. My chickens need to be where they can be taken care of. I honestly thought I could do this again when I started a couple of months back.
Perhaps some assistance with caring for your husband would help. I'm not saying have someone else take on his care but rather someone to give you a break so you can find something that brings joy back into your life so that you have a love of being alive.
There are counselors that can assist with this. I believe here they can be found through the State Department of Aging and they are free. I would hope that your state would as well. Here is their mandate in our state.
The Pennsylvania Caregiver Support Program works to ease the stresses of caregiving by focusing on the well-being of the caregiver. The program provides the primary caregiver with reimbursement for out-of-pocket costs associated with caregiving, such as respite, caregiving-related services and supplies. The program also offers education, training, counseling, and more.
I hope that this helps. I am worried for you. My mother lost the will to live many times through her journey with C diff. Yet we got her through it and this is how she spent her Easter. She will tell you the fight was worth it in the end but it is so hard to see that when you are in the middle of it.
