@featherhead007 I am reading all of your posts .....and want to grab your shoulders and SHAKE YOU! (but also give you a hug)
You can't look at the past...hindsight is always 20/20. You have done the best you could/can at each point in your life, given where you were and what you were capable of at the time. (emotionally, mentally, physically, etc) We all, hopefully, grow and change as we gain life experiences, wisdom, and personal strength.
You need to look forward. What do YOU want out of life? Where do you see yourself going from here? And I don't mean 'to have more wealth than my brother'. That says nothing about what would make you happy or bring you comfort/joy. Because comfort, happiness, is NEVER about what other people have. It is about what you truly want for yourself in your heart. Simple things - friends, to garden, chickens, maybe to believe in God, whatever. You need to take some time to do some real soul searching, and think about what makes you happy/content. Focus on those things in your life. You are a good, kind man. It is time you really paid attention to ALEX. The heck with what the rest of the world has or wants - it should now be about what Alex really, deep down, wants.![]()
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Okay, I need to leave now; need to spend the next hour getting pictures to pay my taxes for this post.![]()


Well put!
And Alex owes some pics also, jaffar, some barred rocks and wattles, and any other of the chickies
