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Claires Poultry said:
Wow, you've come a very long way. Now you're such a kind, respectful man. I never would've guessed you used to be like that.
I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that.
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Thank you for the kind words, but don't feel sorry for me. I don't mean that in a negative way. See, if some of that had never happened, I may have never got the chance to change. I'm not proud nor ashamed of it, but it is a reality of my life in the past.

Some of the strongest lessons I've learned in life came from listening to other people's mistakes. I've learned that everybody has a story, and nobodies is perfect.

If find by sharing my stories, and there are many more, that it helps me either deal with them, or to not repeat them. The whole reason for sharing them though is in the hopes of being able to reach someone in need. Let them know they are not alone, and that regardless of what has happened in life, they have the power to change. If I can only reach one person, then putting my past and current emotions out on display is far worth it. It's far to easy to get caught up in what a person knows, almost like wearing blinders.

If we as people never look outside of the box, well, we'll never what we are missing. Never know if what we are doing is right. If it's how we want to live, or represent ourselves.

There's a reason I waited to bring stuff like that up.
1) It's not how I want to be represented.
2) To provide testimony that things can change, people can change, and we can be happy regardless of our past.
3) I've been having a hard time myself recently, and just wanted to get some pressure off my on chest. That story is so impactful to me, that I can't even read my own words without getting a tear in my eye.

When I talked about Colleen, and her showing me I can think for myself. It made me realize I do no have to follow in the footsteps of those before me. I didn't need to be an abusive drunk like my uncle. Didn't have to be sacred of everything like my mom, or live in such a controlling environment that she provided. Be a dead beat like my father. The list of relatives I do not want to be like just continues on.

You have a long beautiful life ahead of you. I know at times it may not feel that way, but you're a strong person and I believe that.

Chin up kiddo! :hugs
 
Duck_life said:
I feel like others can listen and relate to this and get help when they need it.
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I hope so. Even if it's not till a year later and someone just comes across it, I hope it does help.
Duck_life said:
If that was a real book I would diffidently buy it! :clap
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Thanks! My English professor LOVED me. I've written some very controversial parers that go against the grain. I once had to present a paper to the class so controversial, that my professor warned me "You are going to make enemies if you read this." She was right, and I did, but I didn't care about having an opposition, I cared about the subject, deeply.

By the time I was finished 5 people left the room, and 3 where crying including my professor. It's not that I was a great student, I was just honest.
 
Trimurtisan said:
I hope so. Even if it's not till a year later and someone just comes across it, I hope it does help.

Thanks! My English professor LOVED me. I've written some very controversial parers that go against the grain. I once had to present a paper to the class so controversial, that my professor warned me "You are going to make enemies if you read this." She was right, and I did, but I didn't care about having an opposition, I cared about the subject, deeply.

By the time I was finished 5 people left the room, and 3 where crying including my professor. It's not that I was a great student, I was just honest.
Click to expand...
You seem so positive even after everything that has happened to you, I am not positive even after all having amazing friends, I just feel like my life can't be repaired :confused:. But you seem so determined it's unbelievable how you are still here sharing your experience.. it's a great thing you're doing sharing this ;)
 

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